All over the map...

That is how I feel tonight, all over the map. I am elated that a dear friend, Kris Sumey, who Pete and I met last year when we served with the Leadership Summit in PA, has sent out letters to an enormous number of people telling our story and asking them to donate to the Overnight Walk (www.TheOvernight.org , Laurie's Legacy). Pete and I went to a movie, tonight, Hotel Rwanda. Such a hard story and it's true one. Why do people hate one another? Why do we turn a blind eye to a horrible situation? I cried at the horror of it yet it happened just 11 years ago in Africa. Did I listen to the news? Did I do a thing? Can I make a difference now with my love for South Africa? I hope so.

And then there was an amazing reminder of Laurie's compassion. I was led to another blog (www.xanga.com/ellen_leann) This girl who I don't know but she must have known Laurie, was downtown Friday night. She writes that she met a homeless man, talked to him a while, then 15 minutes later he comes back and said, "Hey, Laurie, can I have some of that? She froze and then he said, "Oh, wait you're not Laurie, she's not here is she?" Their conversation went on. I won't cover it all here but this homeless man remembered Laurie and Ellen came away smiling and thinking this kind of ministry is like seeing a piece of Laurie's heart.

So much more this weekend. Breakfast with sweet Kim Zubb, 45 minute drive to Berwyn to see little Denver walk in the 5 minute parade for the Opening Day for Little League. What do we do do with Laurie's laptop? Drew joining the Overnight team. Thoughtful emails back and forth with Scott. I have heard about another young person I know dealing with thoughts of suicide. Singing "How great is our God..." at church crying. Finally not getting painful shin splints tonight when I walked. Am I going forward or backwards on this map? I can't tell.

And now, I look back at what Laurie wrote in her journal on this date while she was in Mexico. She starts: "God...You are my strength. I've decided to start a fast. I need to draw nearer to God and and I feel like this is how I can do it. Complete dependence on Him." She writes some more, and then ends with, "So God...give me strength. Tonight I pray for Steve Cook and Jammie Meyer. May they feel Your presence in this momoent. Give them bold dreams and desires...help them to seek You with reckless abandon. Show them Your love for them...may they get a glimpse of Your unbelievable grace. Remind them that Your one and only Son died on a cross...for them. Nobody else in mind...just them. You are so good and I love You! Laurie "

God, You are my strength. You are so good and I love you, Barb